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take a breath, sisters

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It’s been a little crazy around here.

It’s been VERY unscheduled around here.

My day job (and sometimes night job) is on a church staff. Office-wise, we kind of go with the school flow, which means hours are pretty flexible when school is out.

Hurricane Florence has meant that school is still out. In fact, I’ve been home with the kids for two weeks, like a Christmas break 2.5 weeks after school started.

Aaaaaand, the girls are off this week, too. (Jack attends a private preschool, and they are opening. Jesus is Lord, y’all!)

The big picture here is huge. If you’ve seen my posts on Facebook or Instagram, you’ve seen. Our county and surrounding areas are undergoing historic, horrific flooding. Some of our schools are flooded, while some are being used as shelters. Many, many families are evacuated, with homes severely damaged or destroyed. Many roads are closed, encumbering access for busses, supplies, and employees. It’s a huge, heartbreaking mess.

So our crazy days are just a small price to pay.


~ That said… there is a price.

  • What do we do when everyone and everything is on our last nerve?
  • How do we refresh when we cannot even take a breath without being asked for something or go to the bathroom in peace?
  • Can we really get what we need when people depend on us around the clock for safety, sustenance, protection, entertainment, etc. etc. ETC.?


I have not done well living this out the past two weeks, but


the answer is YES.

Yes, you can walk around the block/sit in the running car/lock yourself in the bathroom with a magazine for a few minutes and reset.
Yes, you can do the 10-minute workout instead of the 40-minute one. It still counts and some exercise it better than nothing.
Yes, you can take a shower by yourself and let the hot water wash it away.
Yes, you can sit on the porch alone with one, single, hot cup of coffee and drink in silence.
Yes, you can pay a babysitter and not go to work, run errands, or even engage in a hobby. You can pay someone to be with your kids while you do nothing.
Yes, you can let your husband take a day off work so you can get away, be a total fail at finding any peace or refreshment, and laugh with him about it as you both lie exhausted and drained at the end of it.

As Deanna and I go forth with The Refreshed Life Show, researching and reading about the things we talk about, we do run into some sort of “resistance” against self-care. The only thing I can figure with that is that too many of us have been taught to believe we must put ourselves last, all the time.

The truth is, when Jesus said “Love your neighbor,” He added, “AS yourself.” Not instead of, folks.


I am taking some steps this coming week to show myself some love. I have to get my head on straight in order to tackle the next few months, which will be filled with running kids everywhere, birthdays and holidays, work projects, and big, new things in this very space.

“Self-care” does not mean “self-absorbed.” It means that when someone commenting on the simplest things makes me want to claw their eyeballs out, I need to be a big girl and own my feelings and figure out a way to decompress – and not feel guilty about it because there is a reason I am here. It’s because I have served and given, and now, I need to break.

Let us stop lying to ourselves that we can do it all, that we don’t need to replenish. It’s not the model that God, science, or any healthy person has set for us.

Take a breath, sisters. And once you have, look to the left or right. There is a sister next to you who needs this reminder as well.


  • Join Deanna and me for a look at our “Self-Care Tool Kit,” this Wednesday, 9/26, at 9:30am ET on The Refreshed Life Show.
  • I am currently working with a few sweet and brilliant friends proofing draft 1 of The Tentative Knock. For a preview of chapter 1, sign up for my email list.
  • Happy, happy, happy birthday to my first daughter, Paige! May you have many more fun adventures in beautiful cities where handsome strangers take your picture.

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